Parallel parenting is a form of co-parenting after a divorce that many people praise for its ability to help lower or even eliminate the chance of arguments and disputes. This is often a lifesaver for couples who want to co-parent but simply cannot do so directly after divorce.
But does it work for everyone, or does it have unseen drawbacks that might make it incompatible with your family? Are there situations in which it is not ideal?
Who parallel parenting suits
Healthline takes a look at the option of parallel parenting. This temporary form of co-parenting allows for parents to raise their children together without interacting directly. You can only communicate through writing, such as texts or letters. You can even avoid conversing by simply passing a notebook with details about your visitations and important information regarding your child.
When this style of co-parenting works, it gives parents time to cool down and gather themselves after a divorce. It is a needed break and distance from one another, which helps lower the chance of arguments or disputes. This is one of the most traumatic parts of divorce for many children, so it is important to prioritize.
When can you not rely on parallel parenting?
However, parallel parenting does not work for everyone. Some people simply have too much bad blood between them for even these measures to prevent arguments. Additionally, parallel parenting serves as a temporary form of co-parenting. You cannot rely on it, because a judge will eventually want to “graduate” you to a more cooperative and interactive form of co-parenting.
Sometimes, a relationship falls apart to the point that nothing can repair it, even the desire to make things easier on your child. In these situations, you may want to pursue other means of custody and co-parenting.